Thank Goodness for Small Blessings :)

Well it's been a really good but very tiring week for us !!!

We found out that my husband's disability benefits were approved .. so that was step one .. ! We also got qualified for a rental subsidy which will help us out until i find work again .. :) .

And this weekend went so fast .. my youngest boy turned 15 on Saturday .. took him to see New Moon .. I even enjoyed it .. ! We have a nice neighbor to clip my doggies nails for us without her biting the poor woman ... we had put up our freezer for sale and thats how we met her .. she bought it from us !! Turns out shes done Pet Grooming for 10 yrs ... so thank you Lord for small blessings!! One more happy bit of news my oldest son got his High School Diploma in the mail on Friday .. Somehow we got him thru it I have no idea .. but he made it whohoooo ... in many ways that boy has been my greatest challenge in this life but he s growing into a fine young man and im so proud of him !!! :D

So far things that I have been praying so hard are starting to come true ... I m glad I have kept my faith and hung in there .. but it's never been easy. I am also happy to say that the stronger meds my doc put me on for anxiety attacks are finally doing its job !!

My blues are finally gone .. either that or i m just finally dealing with everything .. its been alot to handle lately .. i miss my mum and dad still very much but i know they are both out of pain now and for that I am grateful .. And also they both had come to accept the Lord into their lives ... and that also gives my heart peace of mind :) . It's so great to blog with a joyful heart .. and i am finally going to put up my Christmas decorations .. am finally getting into the Spirit of it all :) ... !! Happy Holidays my dear friends ... and thanks for reading through my dribble .. i know its not been very positive or fun lately .. but i always keep it real .. God bless you my friends .. xxx

Please keep my family in your thoughts & Prayers

I wonder if God is testing me right now .. because i cannot think of any other reason why all this is happening at once to my family.

These past 6 months .. (particulary the past 7 weeks alone) have been heart wrenching for my family .. I have already talked about most or some of these with others here .. and thanks so much to you all who have shown your love and support though this time .

In late April of this year my beautiful mother passed away .. after fighting lung cancer for the past 8 years . Its such a sad irony when something like this brings one closer to their Mother .. but in this case it did .. A year ago i went to spend a week with her in Ottawa and we laughed, cried and just enjoyed being together for that time . I am both sad but yet relieved that she is out of her pain finally .. she was tired and finally asked God to take her home .
'Miss you Mom"

Six weeks ago, near the end of September i got a phone call from my half sister ... My father had also passed on ... his cancer was both in the liver and his colon .. it was very fast one in his case .. .drs said in the beginning he would be gone in 2 months .. he made it to 18 bless him !!! He was always smiling and so strong most of his life ... He was a truck driver for many years .. away for weeks at a time when he drove all through Canada & USA. But eveyrone that met him remembered him .. he lit up a room when he entered it .. some thought him too loud and brash ... but that was how my Dad was ... he cared deeply for his family and worked hard all his life . This one has been much harder for me to deal with .. it just progessed so quickly in his case. Again i am glad he is out of his pain .. but i shall miss my wonderful Dad who always made me laugh .. 'you had the best hugs dad .. i miss you so very much'

A week before that i was fired from my job and my oldest son moved out ... and for those of you who have been thru this its not easy to let go when your child moves out !!!

Meanwhile my husbands health has been getting worse this year too .. this summer he finally went to drs to find out why his left hand was shaking so badly ... it has now progressed to the entire arm ... After doing some tests and seeing 3 different drs .. they all conclude he s in the early stages of Parkinson's Disease.

Now im not even sure if im going to make my planned trip to the UK now to see my fav band play .. and whats hurting me even more is this may be their last tour ever :(

I've been going thru alot of bad depression in these past weeks including anxiety attacks. I m not trying for sympathy .. but i do think i need prayer to help me cope with everything thats been happening to me and my family this past year ... i also think its sapped most of my strength out of me to be honest .. If i had no faith i would be totally lost here ... I cant do this alone anymore ..